I wrote this in 2012. I am here standing on this summit…still. Perhaps, 2018 will be the year for embracing.
by Ginger Teppner
clar-i-ty n. 1. Clearness of appearance 2. Clearness of thought or style; lucidity,
[ME,clarite,brightness<Lat. claritas,clearness<clarus,clear. See clear.]
As I ran today, I experienced a rare translucent moment of lucidity. A rare transparent moment. A moment as location where everything is intelligible, easily understood.
I will attempt to map this experience, to share it, to shine.
It began with the image of a mountain. I saw myself standing on the peak. It was clear that I had stood on this peak many times, moment after moment, lifetime after lifetime. It was clear that I was strong and resilient, and I had fought and clawed my way to this summit over and over again.
The image shifted. And I saw the word RESIST at the top of the mountain, which now resembled the head of an arrow pointing skyward.
I believe energy moves on the word, through words, and in this moment of lucidity, I witnessed energy attempt to infiltrate RESIST the word. I literally watched energy flow into what quickly became a structurally reinforced brick wall of resistance. I realized that by definition, its language, its very nature, the word RESIST can do nothing other than resist, manifest resistance. Where can the energy trapped within the parameters of this word go? I watched as some of the energy stagnated and some of it slipped backwards down the mountain, back in the direction from where it came. It could no longer move forward. RESIST is impenetrable.
I saw myself as the wily coyote deftly maneuvering through barbed wire resistance, making progress to be sure, only to be faced with a forty foot high sheer steel wall of ACME strength resistance, that I managed to climb over to be sure, only to be faced with an ocean of sharks with resistant teeth, which I managed to swim across to be sure, only to be faced with…
The point is: RESIST always resists. And it doesn’t matter how hard you fight. Sure, you can make progress or so it seems, but when you look back at the journey you might realize you haven’t moved at all, that you are still stuck within the parameters of a word. One little word.
The point is: that every instance through all those lives and moments when I reached this pinnacle, when I got so close to realizing the secrets on the other side of the mountain, the language that encompassed my experience was a language of resisting change. And as long as I was resisting, I could not move forward. Not really. It is energetically impossible to resist and embrace simultaneously.
I have said before that language is incredibly powerful, but this is sometimes hard to adequately articulate. In this moment of clarity I saw very clearly that a shift in language is a shift in consciousness, that to shift from I resist (the old) to I embrace (the new) is irrevocably transitive.
So I watched myself take an imaginary eraser in my mind and erase that one word at the top of the mountain. I scribbled another in its place. Instead of RESIST, I wrote: EMBRACE.
I embrace. I accept. I am open. I am receptive. I am willing to map the other side of this mountain.